“One of the great wounds in life is the shattering of relationship — having a friend who turns on us and reverses shalom or what the Bible calls peace. Betrayal is the experience of being set up, violated, and then discarded. It is being used by someone who violates our dignity and then is unmoved by our pain.
Such betrayal, for whatever reason, isolates us in loneliness, doubt, and shame. The connection we once assumed and enjoyed becomes a web of awkwardness. We don’t know whether to speak to the estranged friend when our paths cross, or simply pass with eyes averted. To the degree there is avoidance, suspiciousness grows. If there is conversation, it is constrained and tight, marking the contrast to the way it once was. This is the soil where blame shifting and slander can grow like robust weeds.
The memory of how-it-once-was burns a deep and hollow spot in the heart. Memory haunts and self-doubt grips. Why did it end? What did I do wrong? Why does my friend no longer like me? The intense shifts between angrily blaming the other and cutting oneself with the shards of self-doubt are exhausting.” ~Dan Allender
Allender speaks clearly of the chaos in the heart and mind when betrayal has been experienced. It is a lack of peace in our deepest parts. How…how, in those moments, do we consider Jesus? How do we stand firm on the Rock when our minds are haunted with memories and self-doubt? The constant cutting of oneself with the shards of broken relationship is not only exhausting…it leaves one bloodied and crying out for relief.
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me–watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.“
Jesus says I can live light and free.
Jesus says I can walk in unforced rhythms of grace.
Jesus says I can have a real rest and recover the life He wants me to live.
These are the promises Jesus gives to those who will follow after, and learn from Him.
Who is Jesus? He is a true friend. He does not “set us up, violate, and then discard” us. He does not make promises He never intends to keep. He is the one who sticks closer than a brother. He is a husband to the forsaken bride crying in the wilderness.
He loves with an everlasting love and He gives an unshakeable peace.
Betrayal is soul-wrenching. Its never-ending shattering peace gives way to many doubts and unanswerable questions, unless…
You turn to Him.
Go to Him.
Lay down your burdens and confusion,
Your pain, and your doubts,
Your fears, and all your tears,
All of it. Lay it down…at His feet.
Bow down and consider Jesus.
“For the mountains may be removed and the hills may shake,
But My lovingkindness will not be removed from you,
And My covenant of peace will not be shaken,”
Says the LORD who has compassion on you.
“Come unto Me all you who are weary and heavy-laden,
And I will give you peace.”