He’s Remarried


It’s been almost six months since the divorce was final.

Both of those statements are completely surreal…

But, do I have any right to question his choice?

I hear they’re great together.  I pray so…

My daughter wants to start talking again.

My heart hopes, but, Lord,… my mind tells me to slow down…give her space…

I broke trust with her.  With him.  With them all.

Take the pain away, please, God.  Please, help us heal…

Any chance for reconciliation is over.  A New Covenant has begun.

So, Lord… does this make me an adulterer forever…especially if I hope to marry again…

Do I get to remarry?  Do I have any right to happiness again?

How far does grace extend???




10 responses »

  1. Oh, Michelle….. I’m so sorry there is so much hurt. I love you. And God’s grace is sufficient for ALL of this! Of course you have the right to happiness again, and the right to remarry. No… you are not an adulterer forever. That was never your name anyway… only what you did. There is a HUGE difference between the two. Your name is forgiven, much beloved, daughter of the King, Redeemed. The Blood Jesus shed on the Cross has not suddenly disappeared and become unavailable to you, in fact you will get to experience the fullness of the Cross. This has been cast into the sea of forgetfulness. God will not remember it against you…. you can move forward knowing you are washed as white as snow. I realize there are ongoing consequences that you will be dealing with, perhaps for a long time to come, but nothing is going to change how your Heavenly Father feels about you! Your reality right now may feel so much different, but with God you can stand again without condemnation and knowing that you are a precious and lovely princess. How would you feel about your children if they messed up? You would forgive them and love them and help them and stand with them through all of the consequences of their actions. Your Heavenly Father will do no less for YOU!

    I will be praying for your relationship with your daughter. I’m sure it will take time, but thankfully she wants to start communication. It is a new beginning.

  2. I hit the like button. . . because I love you. Just praying, in tears as I read this. May He gently and tenderly hold you today and give you the answers that you need to know and hear. love and prayers, sweet one.

  3. Oh my sweet friend…. yes, yes, a thousand times yes!!! Oops, not the part that you’ll be an adulterer forever…. the where sin abounds grace abounds more part…. I could spend some time here and list all of the scriptures that have to do with how completley we are forgiven… but we know them don’t we? I know this one… my ex married 5 months after our divorce… the circumstances were different, the result was the same. God is not shaken… in your case you made a mistake… there were consequences for it… but to beat yourself up the rest of your life is not one of them. Both of us have so much life to love, live and serve… it’s SO exciting!!!! Let God and time heal… He is preparing for both of us, our futures, our husbands, and until He shows us who they are, He is… our everything. It doesn’t get much better than that. Yes you’ll remarry, so will I… Yes things will work out with your children, it will with mine too. Yes we will serve Him, we are still highly favored. How do I know? How can I be confident? Because it’s not about me, it’s who HE is…. and I choose to believe Him. I will come to your wedding if you come to mine…. we can celebrate Christ together.

  4. Oh I love Debs comment to you!!!!! There, He came and tenderly gave you the answers to the questions you were asking! 🙂 love you!

  5. You my sister are free! A good choice of words “new covenant”…you also are under the New Covenant in Christ! God has already forgiven you, and you are no longer condemned! Praise God! No human being has the right to make you feel like anything less than the Princess you are. If it were up to our own righteousness none of us are going to Heaven… The blood of Jesus still runs as strong and powerful today as the day HE spilled it….You are FREE to be a free living being…experiencing all that life has to offer…yes remarry, dance naked in your bedroom (maybe not in the street =D)…Allow God to open up doors and walk thru them…I am praying for everything good to happen in your life!

    I love you and how honest you dealt with everything…you believed that God knew everything, and you did all you could humanly do…. God is the only one who matters…and HE adores you, wants your happiness, and has already forgot what we are even talking about… FREE!!! ( I also get to dance at your wedding!)

    I really want to address Mr.Phat…but not sure this is the place to do it! God also seen everthing he did!

  6. Oh ladies, thank you all!
    I wrote this before going to bed last night…it is literally my thoughts and heart cries before sleeping. I decided to post it, thinking maybe it would help someone, anyone, who may be feeling the same…and also, praying I would get some words of encouragement. (Is it okay to ask for that…?) Then, I couldn’t sleep wondering if it was too much information…

    I really do struggle with Jesus’ words in the Sermon on the Mount and through Paul in 1 Corinthians. I do believe grace extends further than any of us can imagine…we really are swimming in it…I just seem to be able to give it better than I receive it. 😦

    Thank you, Heidi, for reminding me of how I would work with my children…Oh yes, ma’am…I will always stand by my children. Even knowing God is not stingy with grace, as so many of us humans can be, it’s still hard to believe He doesn’t act like those around us. Some are so condemning and unwilling that any should be allowed happiness. But, thank you. I don’t have to worry about them. God sees it all. He knows it all. And yes, thank you concerning my daughter. We had a delightful evening together. Yaaaaaay, God! Love you, Heidi.

    Oh, Debbie, I so appreciate all your prayers and your consistent words that uplift my soul. And yes, doesn’t Debs have a way of answering! 😉 Love and hugs to you!

    Thank you, thank you, thank you, Debs. He is preparing us… Wow. I believe that with my whole being…for another place and time…and I do pray He might still have some happy times available for the here and now. I will gladly come to your wedding and hope to have a celebration in my future, as soon as He deems me ready…thank you for the confident words. Confidence in Him…not me…amen. Love you much.

    Oh, Princess, please, if I have a wedding in my future…will you teach me to dance? He’ll really have to do a work in me on the naked bedroom dancing…ahem… 😳 …well…moving on… 😳
    Thank you for reminding me of the New Cov’t of His blood… Amen. I am clean. I am free. I am adored. I need those words to become my mantra… Thank you for loving me through all of this…and for your prayers. I love you.

  7. Yes ma’am-no sin is greater than grace that saturated the air after He took His final breath at the cross-it is finished sweet sister, all the sin, all the unrighteousness, all the labels.

    I love what Heidi said; you committed adultery (past tense), you are not an adulterer (present and future tense). Sin is something we do, not who we are and praise God for that because if that weren’t the case well I can come up with a whole list of names for this sinner right here. I think I shared this before but an elder at our church recently preached about grace and how instead of saying we’re “sinners saved by grace” we need to start claiming how God sees us: “saints who sin.” You are a saint in His eyes (as unfathomable as that can be I know) and don’t allow the enemy tell you otherwise.

    And the remarry and happiness piece? I am a living witness to both (and so much more) praise God.

    All for His glory…

    Love you, Sis.

  8. I love you, Sweet Girl! Thank you for confirming the Truth to me. Sometimes my old ways of thinking (legalism) creep back in and bring me down. Yes, I need to keep reminding myself that I am not defined by what I’ve done…my label comes from Him…Beloved. You know, I can type the words so easily, but the deep heart knowledge of being anyone’s beloved is so hard to grasp. How God sees me…how God sees me…how God sees me…!!!

    Yes, ma’am, you are definitely a living witness to the happiness of remarriage! And, those precious babies are God’s most gracious gift to you. Someday I’m gonna get to hold them!

    I love you. xo

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