Cry out to God,
“Deliver me, Most Merciful Father!”
He will come and save you.
That’s the promise.
Have you ever been rejected, pushed aside, or left alone?
I can’t think of anything more painful than to be left to defend for one’s self.
And yet, are we ever alone?
You’ve heard the aphorism: There are no atheists in foxholes.
In times of extreme distress, or fear, man is known to cry out to God.
“Please, save me!”
The times I’ve done this were when giving birth. But, the most difficult, the saddest moment was with the death of my second child.
I had a miscarriage in the 12th week of pregnancy. While at the doctor’s for a regular check-up, he could not find the heartbeat. It had been heard previously. The plans, the hopes, the dreams for our second child were well underway. We intended to have two babies very close together, and this would make them 15 months apart. To say we were elated — with God’s blessing us so closely from our first gift to our second — would be putting it mildly. But, when the news came of our baby’s death, we were devastated.
I’ve always been grateful to the doctor for not rushing a D&C. Some doctors will do that right away, in hopes of stopping the possibility of hemorraging. But, for some reason, my doctor was willing to let nature take its course. He let me know I would probably begin bleeding in the next 5 days, but not to worry, in most cases women only experience a heavier period than normal.
Those days were racked with grief. I remember wondering how Rox could speak without emotion when sharing the details of her miscarriage, so many years before. I knew this was death. And, I was in mourning.
As nature took its course, I experienced a complete delivery; my water broke and I delivered my tiny baby. I was weeping when the hemorraging began. As quickly as possible, we made it to the hospital to meet the same doctor who had delivered my healthy baby boy, only nine months before . . .
I was rushed into the ER. With agonizing pain from the contractions, and the loss of blood making it difficult for the nurse to find a vein, I began crying out to God, “Please, Jesus, help her find a vein!”
“This is too much to bear. Please, God, help me!”
The doctor patted my arm to let me know he was there. I asked why the pain was so much worse than a normal delivery. “Oh, it’s perception, I think,” he responded . . .
“You know the outcome is not going to be good.”
Thankfully, not many minutes past, the anesthesia took affect . . .
Thinking back on it now: my “go to” was God.
I knew the doctor couldn’t help me.
I knew my husband couldn’t make anything different.
I knew the end had come.
I needed God’s comfort.
I needed God’s words to engulf my mind.
I needed God’s assurance that He would be there…
That He would walk me through the valley of the shadow of death.
Today, with a twenty-year old memory, I find comfort once more.
Rejection from divorce is a most painful reality.
I am experiencing that reality, and it’s much like the shadow of the valley of death. The marriage is gone. And, I find myself mourning the loss of thirty years with the man I believed I would be with until death.
Jesus was rejected, too. He was rejected by men.
But, the rejected stone was The Living Stone.
So as you come to Him — a living stone rejected by men but chosen and priceless in God’s sight — you yourselves, as living stones, are built up as a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood and to offer spiritual sacrifices that are acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. ~1Peter 2:3-4
And He is using me, another rejected stone, to become a living stone.
A house built for Him.
To the praise of God through Jesus Christ, my Lord.
Who is your “go to?”
Do you know, when you are afraid, you can trust in Him?