“You’re beautiful. Truly beautiful.”
I don’t believe this. I have not believed this for most of my life.
Of course, I love to hear it. But I’ll usually laugh if someone says it, not at all accepting the words as true.
This really frustrates Phat. I mean, really. Over the years I’ve come to understand that in some weird way he does believe this about me. I’m never really sure how that’s possible because, you see, this is not false humility. I really do NOT see it.
I know all my faults.
I see all my scars.
I hear all the words of disapproval from the many years of not meeting the standard of perfection.
But, do you know what’s even more amazing? Phat sees me when I’m naked and still says I’m beautiful. Really!
Now, come on! That’s just freaking remarkable. Truly mind-boggling. It’s hard to get my head around but,…
…he really means it.
I’m Phat’s bride and he loves me. I am his and he is mine. He delights in me. Whether I get it or not…he does!
And I’m kind of, hopefully, maybe…starting to believe it’s true. I mean, he believes it…really believes it. Astounding!
So…why don’t I believe God when He says it? God says He loves me. God said Jesus died for me when I was unlovely.
Hmmm…? I am called the bride of Christ. The church is the bride of Christ and I am part of His church.
When did that happen? When He saw me naked and knew I needed covering. He came and covered me with His righteousness. His blood covers all my sin.
He saw me, parading around in my nakedness, without proper covering and He covered me in Him.
Much as Ruth, in her helpless state, was covered by Boaz, her kinsman redeemer.
He has always been concerned about covering His chosen ones and declaring them beautiful. But even when I was not beautiful, He loved me. He cleaned me up and clothed me in His robe of righteousness.
I will rejoice greatly in the LORD,
My soul will exult in my God;
For He has clothed me with garments of salvation,
He has wrapped me with a robe of righteousness,
As a bridegroom decks himself with a garland,
And as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.
I’m beginning to see me as He sees me.
It’s kind of…freeing…
Then you will experience for yourselves the truth,
and the truth will free you…
So if the Son sets you free, you are free through and through.
And as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride,
So your God will rejoice over you.